by Johanna Osborne and Emma O’Keefe

Most of us brides can vividly recall the frenzy and massive build up to our big day. It’s all about the planning, the anticipation,the nerves and of course the excitement. And boom, suddenly that very special wedding day is here – surprisingly fast and almost out of nowhere! And before you know it, it’s all over again. Armed with happy memories, a shiny new ring and a sore face from smiling so much, you go from being engaged one minute to being married the next. You wake up the following day a real Mr & Mrs! Wow! What a whirlwind, what an adventure…

But what happens after the wedding? When all the exhilaration dies down and the bride and groom resume their normal ever day lives as man and wife?

You might remember the lovely Emma and Paul from Mr & Mrs issue 2. They tied the knot in February 2012, and we were delighted to feature their beautiful wedding in our magazine a mere few weeks later. As Emma is a personal friend of mine, it was an honour to be a guest at her wedding and write about her special day. It was a divine celebration, and I felt very lucky to be part of it. So as a recent bride, I thought Emma was the perfect person to ask for tips to share with future brides-to-be about the all-important first year of marriage.

Fresh from her European honeymoon, looking trim, tanned and terrific, Emma gives me the low-down on all things love and marriage… We have to say, we love her answers!

1. Emma, what would the best tips you could offer to brides in the throes of wedding planning?
Remember why you are getting married – it’s so easy to get stressed about the details of the day – whether it be the flowers, the seating plan etc and forget that it’s a celebration of your commitment to each other, and all of your favourite people are going to be sharing it with you.

2. What did you personally worry about the most leading up to your big day?
I was fairly calm about the actual wedding, as I’m a planner by nature. The thing I worried about the most was my hen’s party! I was more nervous about that than I was on the morning of our wedding! I had no idea what was planned, and I was not at all keen on a more traditional hen’s party where I would be dressed up and made to do dares. Thankfully my sister had planned a beautiful day out at a vineyard in the Wairarapa – it was perfect!

3. In hindsight what part of the planning needs most attention and what parts are in your opinion over exaggerated in terms of time and stress
Putting together the invitations and sending them out took a lot more time than expected. For example, before getting the invites printed, you actually need to know details of the timings of the ceremony, whether you want to have a gift registry etc. And then there’s finding out people’s addresses to post them too – it all took quite a bit of time and effort. What was over exaggerated in my opinion was flowers. I had an excellent florist who I was able to give an idea of what I wanted to, what price I wanted to pay, and she went from there. We met once and spoke on the phone a couple of times, and the end result was exactly what we had discussed. No drama or fuss, and it was all within my budget, which was even better!

4. Secret tip?
Some friends told us to make sure we take time on the actual wedding day to be alone with each other- and to take it all in – otherwise the day goes by so quickly in a blur! So we did just that – we took a bit of time out after all of the formalities, and it was an excellent tip, as it gave us the
chance to take a breather and let the fact we were now married really sink in!

5. What would you add to your wedding if you could do it again?
There is nothing I would add – the day was everything we had planned on

6. Best time and destination for a honeymoon?
We were lucky enough to take a mini-moon to Taupo straight after the wedding, and then went to Europe 6 months after the wedding for a delayed honeymoon. We were definitely in need of a break straight after the wedding, but I’m glad we didn’t go away anywhere too far, as we were pretty exhausted. And being able to take a holiday later in the year gave us something to look forward to once the wedding excitement died down! I’d definitely recommend the Greek Islands for a slice of paradise, or Paris – the city of Love!

7. Nicest thing to do for your husband now that you are a married couple?
Buy him new golf clubs – which is yet to happen!

8. Best memory of your wedding day?
Seeing my almost-husband for the first time as I met him at the front of the Church, and seeing all of my nearest and dearest in one place having a fun time.

9. The secret to a successful wedding is…
being organised, planning well in advance and keeping in perspective why you are getting married

10. The secret to a successful marriage is…
We are lucky enough to have our parents as role models, who have each been married for over 35 years! So I think the key to a successful marriage is to communicate and to do things together that you enjoy.

11. Best advice to couples transitioning back from wedding day bliss into everyday life and routine?
Plan something like another honeymoon or a holiday – it’s exciting to have something to look forward to and plan ahead for

12. What traditions have you instilled in your life with Paul that you grew up with at home?
We always make a big deal of each other’s birthdays and make sure we do something special to celebrate.

13. Some sage words of advice you can give to couples in their first year of marriage… what’s most important?
Making time for each other and definitely not taking each other for granted.